No Angel by Helen Keeble
Publication Date: October 8th 2013
Genre: Young Adult Paranormal
Pages: 352
~Summary~
Rafael Angelos just got handed the greatest gift any teenage boy could ever dream of. Upon arriving at his new boarding school for senior year, he discovered that he is the ONLY male student. But what should have been a godsend isn’t exactly heaven on Earth.
Raffi’s about to learn that St. Mary’s is actually a hub for demons-and that he was summoned to the school by someone expecting him to save the day. Raffi knows he’s no angel-but it’s pretty hard to deny that there’s some higher plan at work when he wakes up one morning to discover a glowing circle around his head.
Helen Keeble’s debut novel, Fang Girl, has been praised for its pitch-perfect teen voice, and VOYA called it “refreshing and reminiscent of Louise Rennison’s Confessions of Georgia Nicolson series.” No Angel brings you angels and demons like you’ve never seen them-complete with the wry humor of Vladimir Tod, sinfully irreverent romance, and some hilariously demonic teenage dilemmas.
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~Excerpt~
In which our hero arrives
at his new school…
The shiny new sign above the towering wrought-iron gates said St. Mary’s Boarding School for Girls and Boys,
which, as it turned out, was wrong by one letter.
“Wait,” I said, staring at the Headmistress with a slow-rising
sensation of dread. “You mean I’m just the first guy to arrive, right?”
“If you fail to understand the meaning of the word only, Mr. Angelos, I will have to schedule you for remedial English
lessons,” replied the short, severe woman. “But to make it crystal clear, you
are indeed the first, sole, singular member of the male gender here.” It was
obvious that she considered this at least one boy too many. “I trust you will
be a worthy representative of your species. Welcome to St. Mary’s.”
Declarations of outright war had been uttered in friendlier tones. I
grabbed my dad’s arm as he came back from the car, carrying the last of my
suitcases. “I’ve changed my mind,” I said, turning us away from the waiting
Headmistress. “Don’t leave me here!”
“You were the one who begged to come to your mother’s old school when
you found they were accepting boys this year. ‘A way of honoring her memory’,
you said.” He dropped my bags in front of the school gates and raised an
eyebrow. “Not to mention ‘a heaven of honeys in very short skirts’, as I recall
you saying to your friends.”
I flushed. I hadn’t realized he’d overheard that conversation. “But I
thought there would be at least a few
other guys around. Who am I supposed to talk to?”
“Girls?” Dad suggested mildly.
“Ha ha. Seriously, Dad!”
“You want serious?” Dad folded his arms, looking up at me. “It’s cost
me a serious amount of money to enroll you here, so I expect you to actually
make an effort for once, Raffi. St. Mary’s has always been one of the most
exclusive schools in England, and we’re incredibly fortunate that they’re
opening up to boys at last. And even more fortunate that they’re allowing you
in for just the final year.” His finger jabbed me in the center of my chest.
“You will work hard.”
Behind him, the Headmistress’s expression suggested that she personally
thought boys were best put to work down dangerous mine shafts.
I scowled down at my feet, stuffing my hands into the pockets of my new
suit. “If it’s so fabulous here, then why didn’t any other guys apply?” I
muttered under my breath.
“Our entrance requirements are extremely strict,” the Headmistress said
as if I’d spoken normally. “There was no shortage of male applicants, I assure
you. Were it not for your late mother, I would have rejected you along with all
the rest. But she was a personal friend of mine, as well as an outstanding
member of this institution.” She fixed me with a piercing stare. “I trust you
will live up to her legacy.”
“You hear that?” My dad poked me again. “This is your last chance,
Raffi. You’re lucky to get into any
school, after what happened at your last one. You should be grateful for this
opportunity.” In my head, I started reciting the inevitable speech along with
him. I’d heard it enough times to have it memorized. “You can’t keep wandering
around in a dream, absent-mindedly strewing chaos in your wake.“
Honestly, incinerate one
lousy building by accident once, and
your dad will never, ever let you forget it. “That fire wasn’t my fault!“
“Perfectly ordinary toasters do not spontaneously spout four-foot
pillars of flame!”
The Headmistress took a phone out of her pocket and murmured into it,
“Memo to self: Mr. Angelos is banned from Home Economics.”
My dad was still on a roll. “Your problem, Raffi, is that you’re too
unworldly for your own good. You have got to quit goofing off and start paying
attention to what’s going on around you-“
His voice droned on, but I didn’t hear another word. I was too busy
falling in love.
She was tall, only a few inches shorter than myself, but so light and
slender she seemed to float on the breeze. Her feet barely made any sound on
the gravel as she slipped round the gate and headed for us, her waist-length
blonde hair rippling behind her like a cloak. Even though all the girls must
have been warned boys were joining them this year, she still did a very
gratifying double-take at the sight of me, her summer-sky eyes widening. For my
part, it was all I could do not to gawp at her like a total idiot. The instant
I saw her, I knew her. She was The One.
For a moment we stared at each other. Then the girl shook herself, her
hair shimmering with the movement. A delicate rose tinted her high cheekbones,
but — my stomach dropped into my socks — she didn’t look pleased. A small frown
marred her perfect face as she turned decisively away from me. “M- I mean,
Headmistress?” Even her voice was perfect, so soft and sweet I half-expected
her to break into a duet about kittens and rainbows with a passing bluebird.
“Everyone’s ready and waiting.”
“Thank you, Faith,” the Headmistress replied. She lifted a hand,
cutting off my dad’s lecture. “Major Angelos, while I am certain your son’s
head has not yet been filled with your sound advice, time grows short. I must
ask you to make your final farewells.”
“Of course.” Dad put his hands on my shoulders, looking me squarely in
the eye. “Now promise me you’ll apply yourself, Raffi.”
“Oh,” I said, staring past him at Faith. “You bet I will.”
“That’s my boy.” To my utter mortification, Dad ruffled my hair, then
pulled me in for a hug. “You’ll do fine.”
“Mr. Angelos, you may leave your bags here for now,” the Headmistress
said as I disentangled myself as fast as possible. “Faith will escort you to
the hall. A last word with you please, Major Angelos?”
“This way,” Faith said, holding the gate open for me. She avoided my
eyes, her own gaze lingering on my dad and the Headmistress as they headed back
toward his car. “Your dad seems nice.” There was an odd, wistful note to her
musical voice. “You’re lucky.”
“I certainly am.” Falling into step with her, I tried out the charming,
enigmatic smile that I’d spent the summer practicing in front of the mirror.
“Though not because of my dad.”
“Yes, of course we’re all lucky to get to go to a school like this,”
Faith said, a little too quickly. She indicated the carefully tended flowerbeds
lining the path, and the landscaped woods beyond. I had to admit, it was all
very pretty. Also, unspeakably girly. I could already feel my testosterone
draining away. “It’s so beautiful here, don’t you think?”
I edged a little closer, trying to keep up my smile while also throwing
in a hint of smolder. My face was starting to ache. “Yes, I do.”
“Some of the buildings we use for classrooms are hundreds of years
old,” Faith said, in the bright, brittle tones of someone determinedly paddling
against a conversational undertow. She lengthened her stride, like a tour guide
on a tight schedule. “Look, there’s the main school building. It has many
unique architectural features.” I had a horrible feeling that Faith was about
to start listing them all. Given that the monstrosity rising in front of us
sported everything from Gothic gargoyles to a sort of bonsai skyscraper, she
could probably keep going for hours. “It started as a chapel, though of course it’s
been extended a lot since then. St. Mary’s used to be a convent, you know.”
I was beginning to feel like it still was one. Faith wasn’t looking at
me at all. Time to deploy the big guns. “I know a lot of things, Faith Jones.
Especially about you.”
That got her attention. She stopped dead, swiveling to face me. “What do
you mean?”
Going for broke, I reached for her hand, gazing deep into her
astonished blue eyes as I lifted it to my lips. “I mean that you’re the reason
I’m here.”
This was absolutely true. School brochure, page three, full-page
picture: “After a hard day’s work,
nothing beats a swim in our beautiful outdoor pool!” — Faith Jones. The
photographer had captured her rising from the water with her head thrown back
and water streaming from her hair, looking like some sort of classic
sea-goddess. In a red bikini.
The instant I’d seen that picture, I’d known this was the school for
me. And now all my research in the romance section of the library was about to
pay off big time. All the wariness had vanished from Faith’s face, chased away
by incredulous, breathless hope. Her fingers tightened on mine as my lips
brushed the back of her hand-
“Ah, Mr. Angelos,” the Headmistress said from right behind me. “I see
you’ve introduced yourself to my daughter.”
…
Daughter?
~About The Author~
Helen Keeble is not, and never has been, a vampire. She has however been a teenager. She grew up partly in America and partly in England, which has left her with an unidentifiable accent and a fondness for peanut butter crackers washed down with a nice cup of tea. She now lives in West Sussex, England, with her husband, daughter, two cats, and a variable number of fish. To the best of her knowledge, none of the fish are undead.
Her first novel, a YA vampire comedy called FANG GIRL, is out 11th Sept 2012, from HarperTeen. She also has another YA paranormal comedy novel (provisionally titled NO ANGEL) scheduled for Sept 2013.
Author Links:
~Interview~
1. How would you
describe Rafael Angelos, the hero of No
Angel?
He’s an odd mix of great self-confidence and crushing
anxiety – for example, he’s supremely (and mistakenly) certain that all girls
will find him irresistibly good-looking, but at the same time desperately
unsure how to act in a romantic situation! And despite his attempts to
cultivate an aura of cool, he’s always accidentally letting his inner dork show
through.
He’d describe himself as “just a normal guy”… apart from
this whole halo-and-wings thing, which he is REALLY not happy about!
2. In No Angel, Rafael Angelos discovers that
he is the only male student at a previously all-girls school. Where did you get
the idea for that?
I was listening to a radio program about private single-sex
schools in England, and whether parents thought that they were still a good
idea. There was an interview with the Head of a boys’ school that had gone
mixed-sex because they were struggling to attract enough pupils. He mentioned
that the first year they had only had five girls in the entire school! I
immediately started wondering what it would like to be the ONLY girl at a boys’
school… and then the only boy at a girls’ school. And No Angel was born!
3. One boy surrounded
by girls? Sounds like there’s a lot of potential for romance...
Yep, and that drives a lot of the comedy! Rafael’s main
motivation in coming to the previously all-girls’ school is because he thinks
he’ll have his pick of the lovely ladies. Unfortunately for him, it turns out
that the hottest girl in the school wants to kill him, the nicest girl in the
school is more interested in saving the world than noticing Rafael’s charms
(not to mention that she also has the world’s most terrifying mother), and
while he does end up with a fan club
pining after him, they’re entirely pre-pubescent. And all of that is just the
start of his troubles…
4. Did you find it
difficult to write from the perspective of a teenage boy?
Not really, because we’re all just people ultimately, and I
think that gives us all more commonalities than differences. But boys do have
different social pressures on them than teenage girls, and it was very
interesting to have a chance to explore that.
5. Who’s your
favorite character in No Angel?
I love them all, but I have to admit I have a soft spot for
the Headmistress, who is like all the worst, meanest, scariest teachers you
ever had rolled up into one personality and magnified by a hundred. It’s so
much fun to write someone that sarcastic!
6. Are any of the
characters in No Angel based on
people you know?
Not directly, although my mom used to be a teacher, so a lot
of the teachers in the book are inspired by some of her war-stories.
(I hasten to add that my mom was NEVER sarcastic to students
like the Headmistress is in No Angel…
though she may sometimes secretly have wished to let rip with a devastating
put-down to snotty kids sometimes!)
There is however a lot of myself in the various No Angel characters – one of them has my
relentless (and I’m told occasionally aggravating) optimism, another of them is
a weird loner geek like I was as a teen, one of them has a terrible pre-teen
unrequited crush on an older boy like I… um, that is, I definitely never had
one of those. Nope. No way. *shifty eyes* Uh, next question!
7. Your first book, Fang Girl, was a paranormal comedy about
a vampire fan girl who becomes a real vampire. Is No Angel a sequel?
No, they’re completely unrelated – no characters from Fang Girl show up in No Angel. There isn’t any mention of
vampires in No Angel, and Fang Girl didn’t have any angels or
demons in it, so the jury is out as to whether they’re even set in the same
world. (Even I haven’t quite made up my mind on that one)
However, for those who enjoyed Fang Girl, I can promise that No
Angel has the same sense of humor, including affectionate mockery of
ridiculous paranormal romance tropes! Basically, what I do to vampires in Fang Girl, I do to angels in No Angel.
8. Fun fact about No Angel?
It’s dedicated to my mother, with apologies. The reason for
the apologies will become obvious after reading the book…
~Giveaway~
Thanks for stopping by!
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